Welcome to Independence

College is nothing like the movies; it dashes your dreams of perfection. College is a list of things you never had to think of before: can I put whites in with colors? How much detergent do I use? When is it time to buy a new toothbrush? What type of toilet paper should I get? Are gummy fruit snacks the same as eating actual fruit? The answers to these are yes but not with jeans, a cup, every three months, just steal some from the dorm bathroom, and no unfortunately it’s not, respectively. These answers will only come with time and by asking seemingly stupid questions that people will laugh at you for because it’s been so long since they had to think of such things. College is more than a learning experience; it’s a different lifestyle.

It took me months to figure out even a small portion of what college was about; in the mean time dying all of my clothes blue, almost running out of detergent, my toothbrush’s color fading, being baffled in the toilet paper isle at the grocery store, and feeling like I had gotten scurvy despite all the Welch’s grape snacks I ate. Nobody really asked how I was dealing with college life, people just assumed that I was surviving; as long as I didn’t smell and looked healthy people didn’t seem too worried. But at night I was crying myself to sleep because I was so overwhelmed, with no one to talk to except my roommate, who, I found out during these nights, sleep talks, so the conversation didn’t go too far. It wasn’t until I had spoken with my English teacher about a paper I despised, that we ended up on the topic of college.

My teacher had explained that college, or Academia has its own language and that every incoming student is supposed to be literate in it. It’s the language that every professor speaks, it’s the language that every paper needs to be written in, and it’s the language that you have to somehow magically know before you fail. In essence, college is an immersion program, a hard core immersion program that predicts the outcome of your future. But as your worrying where you classes are and whether or not you have enough money for laundry this week, it’s a bit difficult to think about the long term.

It’s been said that most students change their majors two or three times before they finally decide on one. When I first entered college, I didn’t think I would be one of those students. I now have three possible majors I want to choose from, and none of them are what I came in here with. That is what college is for, to learn about the many occupations out there, and then learn about the specifics of one that interests you. It’s like an apprenticeship, learning the trade of the master until going out on your own; the apprentices used to live in the master’s house to be around their trade all the time, learning the language used, and getting acquainted with their environment. The first semester of college is the same. It’s all about getting used to the new surroundings and just getting the hang of everything.

To get used to the surroundings, just take a walk whenever time permits. Don’t bring a map, just walk, get lost, and use the resources around like the inhabitants of the city, because despite how grumpy they appear to be, they probably aren’t going to bite you, at least not in broad daylight. The ultimate goal in this exercise is to find a place to go that can be a good thinking place to do homework or just to sit and watch people. Even if your roommate isn’t a disruptive one, once in a while, the walls of the dorm start to get boring to look at, even after it’s been decked out with posters, Sobe caps, and pictures of friends back home. I spent days walking around campus trying to find that one spot, and eventually, around town. I have found the stadium a good place to do homework, because even if I sit and do nothing, watching the people exercise makes me feel productive.

And even though laziness has its perks, like going on Hulu for the newest episode of Castle instead of doing math, it also has its drawbacks, like the infamous “Freshman 15,” the 15 pounds of weight that most freshmen obtain. It mainly has to do with eating because, of course, the cafeteria is never open before your class and is just closing when the class gets out. Cookies are not an acceptable substitute for food. As delicious as they may be, the human body needs actual food. I’m not saying the cafeteria serves real food. I don’t even want to know what they make into food. It’s probably protein enhanced hamster meat, with a side of vegetables steamed so much that all the nutritional value has left them anyway, and it makes the school seem as though they care about the student’s health needs. But as disgusting as the cafeteria food may be, it fills up the stomach, and therefore reduces midnight snack-age.

But just because you eat three square meals a day, it doesn’t mean you are exempt from the 15. Exercise, despite its diabolical ploy to make everyone miserable, is essential. Not only do I watch people exercise, I sometimes partake in the festivities. I figure why should I look good at the stadium when everyone else looks like crap? It just so happens that exercise has helped me get a good night’s sleep, which in turn helps me concentrate in classes. Now, I’m not saying you have to run, because I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. But something that relaxes at the same time as keeping you healthy, that way it doesn’t have to be a form a torture, but instead part of a routine.

Getting in a routine is probably the best thing to do in the first week. It’s something comfortingly monotonous in the otherwise chaotic transition that is becoming your life. The routine can be as planned as the exact time to brush your teeth to a general outline of the day. The best thing to incorporate into your routine though is taking time after class to talk to teachers, either about class or just about life. Getting into this habit not only helps build a relationship with a possible future boss, it helps get advice from an “insiders” point of view, what teachers truly expect of incoming freshmen, which surprisingly, is very little, and just an adult who can guide you through at least the first semester. My English teacher has been referenced, and by staying after class, I found that she’s the most human of my professors who either look like they’ve been kept in a lab too long, or are so shy they’ve never learned how to interact with people in general, not to mention students.

In my experience professors are not teachers. There is a huge difference and because of Harry Potter, I had no clue. Professors just know what they are talking about. They have spent years in the field of their study, and just so happen to get offered a job as teaching. Professors just spew facts that sometimes don’t make any sense, because they don’t know how to teach, they just know about their specific area of study. In Harry Potter, on the other hand, professors are teachers, and it confused me to no end. But this isn’t Hogwarts, no matter how much you wish it was, and it’s too late for your letter of admission to arrive. Here, in college, the student has to go and get the knowledge wanted, not wait for the professor to teach it, because that’s not going to happen any time soon. If questions aren’t asked during or right after the lecture, more than likely, the next time in class, the professor will have moved on to a different chapter and a completely new concept.
But sometimes, even asking questions doesn’t help. Fortunately there are resources that can help with the dilemma of poor teaching. Text books for instance, aren’t there just to empty your bank account. They do, in fact, help with the learning experience. The professors I find, just skim over what they deem is relevant during lecture, but sometimes, what’s relevant to the professors is not relevant to you. Therefore, consult the almighty book of knowledge, because it’s better to learn more than necessary, than be unprepared for the test.

The test, despite how much you study, will always have at least one question that was never ever discussed in class or in the book. Study groups however, help narrow down the chances of this happening, after all two heads are better than one. There is bound to be one person in the group who is either spacey enough or smart enough to think of that one question that will bring down the test score. With one person, studying can be tedious and boring. With a group of people, however, studying can be fun, and keep the focus on the subject. But groups don’t always have to be about work; they’re a great way to meet people, and become friends outside of school.

Though college is about the grades, learning about the perfect career, and about doing well, it’s much more than academics. It’s about learning diplomacy within the home, getting along with complete strangers, and being away from your parents. Two strangers aren’t expected to live in a room the size of a large closet and get along all of the time; there are bound to be fights. Diplomacy is essential, as I found out the hard way. To lay things out in a way that is non-threatening, and has absolutely no anger attached, is a very difficult task, especially if it’s been building up; but in the long run, this could be the most valuable thing you’ll ever learn, a skill you can use with coworkers, neighbors, clients, and sometimes with parents who sometimes have a difficult time grasping the concept that you are now independent from them.

But being independent isn’t always the most glorious thing in the world. Being away from all that’s familiar is hard. Where I’m from, my friends would hug me all the time. But here in college, I don’t get hugs anymore, and that was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with. To eradicate this feeling of hug-deprivation, I had my mom send my favorite teddy bear, who up until this point was always decoration. But Mr. Snuggles does his duty in giving me hugs whenever I want, and though having a stuffed animal seems pretty childish now that you’re in college, it’s going to save a lot of embarrassed asking for hugs from the new roommate while there are tears down your face from wanting mom and dad.

College is more than schoolwork. It’s about learning what the “real world” is about. While learning the language used, worrying about what the professors are talking about, there is the constant list of what needs to be done, what’s healthy, and how to deal with living away from home. Granted the first few months are going to be overwhelming, but after that, it’s going to be like breathing--maybe breathing with constant asthma, but at least it’ll be more natural than the suffocating feeling of before. College is a lifestyle, and though there is a lot to learn from it, it’s more than an “experience.”